[butidonthavemoney]

*Room Falls Silent*

*I Approach the Speaking Thingy*

*I Hear a Strange Hush Among All of You*

Me Speaking in English – Gooood day to you, Grizzly people. I have mocked you since the beginning of your crappiness. I made stories of what it would be like if your team went back in time. They were hilarious, but I digress…

You have chosen to steal my precious Ronnie Brewer. This saddeneds me, as I am a Utah Jazzer. Mr. Jazz — or whoever runs this place — is a cheap arse-face. If I had him here with me I would use my MIGHTY STRENGTH to punish his idiotic brain-meats.

Ronnie Brewer is a great passer, teammate, defender and a-many other things like these. But his most epic of wins came in his rookie season. There are various reports of the story, but this is what really happened from my understanding…

Deron Williams – Haha, what I great time I had.

Paul Millsap – I also had a great time too, as well.

Dee Brown – Boy, times like this are really great.

Ronnie Brewer – That was fun and all, but we better turn-in. We have a curfew…

Paul Millsap – Your curfew is meaningless to me!

Deron Williams – Me as well!

Dee Brown – Hey guys, look! It’s a drunken stripper!

Deron Williams – We should go pick on her!

Ronnie Brewer – No way! She has enough problems already!

Paul Millsap – Hey stripper, why don’t you go strip!

Dee Brown – Yeah strip for us now!

Deron Williams – You better strip or else I will kill you!

Stripper – Oh noez!!!

Ronnie Brewer – WORRY NOT STRIPPER! I WILL BUILD YOU A MASSIVE PILLOW FORT FOR YOUR PROTECTION!!!

Dee Brown – Hey you better not!

Ronnie Brewer – Too bad for you! I already finished! Quick hide inside, stripper! It will protect you!

Stripper – MY HERO!!!

Yes. Ronnie Brewer built a pillow fort for the distraught stripper. That’s why he will be the best Grizzly in the history of the Grizzly-city of whatever city your Grizzlies occupy…

[MagikKnickParticipant]

That was touching, it brought a sparkle to my eye….

Whatta Hero!

[butidonthavemoney]

It’s actually true…

“Dee went back to his room to play video games. Williams and Millsap left after she started talking about being raped before and crying. That left Brewer to defend the fort. Apparently it was his room so he “built a divider with blankets and pillows, telling her she could sleep on the bed or the floor if she wanted to stay.”

[MagikKnickParticipant]

And in result for his heroic behavior, the Jazz decide to trade him?!

[knicksfan7Participant]

great story. I wish the Knicks had him so I could be proud he represented my franchise rather than Eddy Curry who takes hot dogs from kids with life-threatening diseases.

[SwatLakeCityParticipant]

Hilarious, though I doubt Millsap, and dwill would pick on a stripper. I see them all helping the stripper, set her priorities straight, and in the end she becomes a new teammate. Perhaps, Sundiata Gaines or the Jazz draft pick in 2010 as well as 2011.

[tli232]

Strippers: You can’t really pick on many of them because they look hotter than most of our girlfriends, to be honest.
And honestly, the good ones are more “ballin'” than most of us. A friend of mine makes 300 on a good day. Best part about being a stripper, you have a flexible schedule with which you may pursue entrepreneurial activities.

[llperez]

stripping was one of the best jobs i ever had. You can’t beat the flexible schedule.

[butidonthavemoney]

Yeah, but this stripper did have problems. She was crying, drunk and talking about how she was raped before. This was a major buzz-kill, so Brown, Williams and Millsap all split. To cheer her up Brewer built her a pillow-fort. I guess she didn’t like it, and she ran out into the lobby and said she was raped by the four Jazzmen. Everybody was questioned but the next day when the stripper sobered up, she admitted she made up the whole thing. (Actually, I think she just stopped talking to the authorities.)

[RUDEBOY]

WOW!!!! I believe there was a JOKE in there somewhere! U were born 70 years too late!! U could’ve been a writer for Silent Movies!!!!

[MuggsyParticipant]

Entertaining nonetheless.

[j1232eParticipant]

were at the huka bar in slc, on march 27, my birthday. I was wearing my jazz hat and shirt because my wife’s b-day present was 14th row Jazz tickets and she would buy the beer all game. After the jazz won we decided to go to this bar after the game, Dee brown and ronnie brewer bought me shot after shot and a couple beers, As I talked their heads off about the team. Meanwill I see paul millsap trying to talk my wife into “hanging out with him tonight” I seen this happining and rushed to millsap to say that is my wife. He told me I think she is into me. She said “Hell NO” and brewer said I think its time to go.

[j1232eParticipant]

getting neagive points for a true story about these fools.

[Author]

Posts