This topic contains 21 replies, has 17 voices, and was last updated by 
FearTheStache 13 years, 4 months ago.
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- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 4:46am #46790
McDunkinRobert Swift’s short NBA career, sadly, produced more bad punchlines than it did productive seasons. The heavily-tattooed big man was drafted directly out of high school in 2004 and was a favorite amongst several well-respected NBA GMs, but his game never found a groove and he last played in the NBA back in 2009. After a stint in the NBA’s minor league and a jaunt playing professionally in Tokyo, Swift apparently has settled back in the Pacific Northwest, living in the same house he bought as a member of the Seattle SuperSonics.
His house was recently foreclosed upon, though, and the new owner would like Swift to abandon the property. Swift, according to the television station KOMO (via Deadspin) isn’t going anywhere. And the rubble surrounding Swift’s current squalor isn’t something you’d expect from someone that turned 27 two months ago.
Seriously – a “Danger Men Drinking” sign on a front door of an actual house? College sophomores would be embarrassed to see that in a dorm room.
As the video shows, Swift’s abode is filled with empties, including Four Loko cans – a product that hasn’t been on the market since late 2010, and can only be purchased on the bro black market. And, as if this was some amazing satire and/or performance art, Swift has a Chevy El Camino with (Bakersfield) California plates from 2010 resting in the driveway without the hood affixed. To say little about his tribal-tat outfitted monster truck parked right behind it.
And the “When In Doubt, Empty the Magazine” bumper sticker affixed just above the warning sign about men drinking just about says it all. Here’s hoping whoever is living inside this residence isn’t mixing one bumper sticker with the other.
KOMO News tried to speak with Swift on Wednesday, and a woman who said she was his girlfriend said he couldn’t come out because he was sleeping.
The new owner has gone to court and, according to records, Swift has gone past his grace period to leave.
He has one final deadline at the end of the month. After that, he faces possible eviction by force.
We disagree with KOMO’s assertion that Swift made “a reported $20 million playing hoops.” Robert worked through the duration of his rookie contract and signed for one year with the Oklahoma City Thunder once that franchise left Seattle in 2008. Basketball-Reference has his overall earnings at just under $11.5 million. Hardly a pittance, and certainly something to buy a house with, but half of what KOMO tossed out.
Still, there’s a bullet hole in one of the windows that isn’t boarded up. There’s a grace period that has expired. There are stupid placards and bumper stickers usually purchased by boys a decade younger than Robert Swift on the front door. Beer cans everywhere, and a career that should be entering its athletic prime gone terribly wrong.
Bummers all around, Robert Swift. Hopefully when you wake up, some of this can turn in the right direction.
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 5:19am #750194
CynthiaParticipant
0- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 10:11am #750228
jj336Participantcynthia, who is mcdunkin, posted a gif just like “her” alter ego mcdunkin. Manti Teo.
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- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 5:24am #750195
joe2324Participantgingers
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 6:00am #750197
TheArtistPaysthePriceParticipantWhy do athletes have mortgages? Just buy the f-ing house outright. I will never understand it, I got a friend that has saved almost every dollar he made since high school, he has a good job but has a mortgage on his house that he pays 4% on and has more than the amount owed on his house in his bank accounts. He saves the same amount in CD’s and collects like 2.5 percent in interest every year. So he pays 4% and collects 2.5% of the same amount that equals net loss.
I liked him coming out, I remember thinking Seattle is going to have a good front line in Petro and Swift someday. We see how that turned out.
The difference between him and Kelly Olynyk is going to a good program and having to earn your keep, hard work and being an idiot versus being a Academic All American.
0- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 7:25am #750207
bobbybParticipantDegenerates come in all forms, and it will be that way till the end of time whether they are drug addicts( Josh Hamilton), gamblers ( Antoine Walker) , Womanizers ( Antonio Cromartie), These guys arent thinking about financial security. They dont learn until it is usually too late
0- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 10:40am #750233
phila9012ParticipantDon’t put josh hamiltons name in with those guys, He came came back and recovered from all of his problems and that is a great story, and he has been doing pretty good for what could have happened to him. His books was really good
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- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 7:21am #750208
Taylor Gang MikeParticipantSad story… Dude had allot of talent after being a McDonalds All American… but dosent everyone? smh
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 9:04am #750217
NYBALLASParticipantI remember the day after he got drafted by seattle their coach or gm was on ESPN and he flat out said they we fielding alot of offers from other teams but that he was going nowhere and all I think about anytime I hear about him is that moment. Id love to know what some of those offers were just so I could see how much he was truly valued and how much of a dumbass that gm or coach was. Im sry but I never understood why him or Spencer Hawes were valued so high in highschool. Yea they’re 7 footers but they both lacked that bang in the post body and didn’t have the broad shoulder build to suggest they ever really would so what u had to hope for was a guy who would ud hope would work up the stamina to run the floor and play what d they could without getting pushed around. Noah is a very heady player so I feel like thats why with his body he does well cause he knows how to utilize his tools. Tyson Chandler has just gotten way bigger since he came into the league but had the body to suggest he would fill out and worked hard as hell to get where he is. Im not gunna get into current young bigs cause they can showcase more in college cause they have to go but I did wanna point out Noahs play style for the sake of how he serves as example.
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 9:20am #750223
Forte IVParticipantYeah I want to know why he didn’t just buy the house outright.
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 11:40am #750244
Olynyk 4 NPOYThe unwritten rule says, don’t draft a red-head and expect him to be anything more than a role player.
0- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 12:17pm #750253
XYRYXParticipantI am legend
– Brian Scalabrine
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 12:20pm #750254
alingeParticipantBlake Griffin was a red-head when he was drafted, he turned out quite well. Other than that though, I really can’t think of anyone who was that good and a red-head
0 - Posted on: Sun, 02/24/2013 - 7:00am #750362
MUbballfanParticipantAre you serious??
– Matt Bonner
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- Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 12:44pm #750259
FearTheStacheParticipantBill Walton says hi.
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 2:30pm #750277
For_Never_EverParticipantHe had a lot of talent ? I remember him being solely taken because he is 7ft.
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 2:38pm #750278
FearTheStacheParticipantSo are you telling me that averaging a 20 and 11 on 65% shooting in a 3 year college career isn’t talent? Are you also telling me that he was voted the Naismith College Player of the Year 3 times in a row solely because he was 7 feet? Wait, when Bill Walton measured at 7 feet, does that mean the NCAA gave his entire team 2 championships because of it? You sir are wrong. Straight up.
0 - Posted on: Sat, 02/23/2013 - 8:43pm #750326
PurpleMonkeyDishwasherParticipantWhat part of this post is funny or worth laughing about?
It’s not funny…. it’s tragic to say the least and if it was about a black player instead of a redhead/white guy there would be 200 posts talking about racism..
0 - Posted on: Sun, 02/24/2013 - 6:35am #750358
joe2324Participant - Posted on: Sun, 02/24/2013 - 6:59am #750361
HitsterParticipantSwift, Sene and Petro, 3 Sonics/Thunder big men who didn’t work out. If one of them had clicked then the Thunder might have gone a different route perhaps missing out on KD, Westbrook, Ibaka and co. Though to be fair to Petro he is still in the league on over $3 million this season so he must be doing something right.
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