This topic contains 14 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by AvatarAvatar SpencerIsHawesome2 13 years, 9 months ago.

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  • #16892
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    butidonthavemoney

    Continued from http://www.nbadraft.net/node/17299

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Curses we lost them again!” llperez shouted as he threw his cookies on the ground in a rage of fury.

    “Yes… curses…” replied LumberJack Iggy who was eying the half-cookie that was now lying on the ground.

    “You, this was all your fault!” llperez said as he pointed to OrangeJuiceJones.

    “My lady-love is gone. I have to get her back into my glorious arms. Whenever she is not around, I get a bad feeling in my gas-bladder…” OrangeJuiceJones said.

    “I’m beginnin…” llperez started to say before he turned around to see LumberJack Iggy now licking the ground where the cookie was dropped.

    “Waste not, want not.” LumberJack Iggy explained.

    “I’m beginning to think that you guys aren’t focused on the real prize, which is tli…” llperez said through his tightly-clinched alien teeth.

    “Is tli the muggle that could bake us more cookies, why not! If only I had my wallet then this program me thinks of buying a new shell for my egg I think the original is rotten.” LumberJack Iggy stuttered.

    “You’re an idiot.” llperez muttered.

    “Well, either way. That ManBearPig has both, so if we kidnap one, we can just get the other.”

    “Where are they going?” llperez asked. “LumberJack Iggy, did they say anything to you?”

    “They told me about Grease Lightning. It’s burning up the quarter mile.” LumberJack Iggy responded.

    “Well, all those prisoners escaped. They are probably going to one of their houses.” llperez explained. “Let’s just pick one at random, and start our search…”

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    ManBearPig ran the entire 7.6 miles to Pepsi Girl’s house, carrying tli and Mrs. Bieber the entire way. Everybody else trailed not too far behind, except Ron Artest. “Hey slow down, or else you guys might lose me!” But Ron’s remark only caused his “friends” to run faster. “Please! I think I need to lie down! Is there a scorer’s table somewhere around here?” Eventually — amidst the panting and complaining — everybody made it to Pepsi Girl’s house.

    “Oh man. You guys didn’t hear me, but I was asking you to slow down. I’m not some kind of professional running guy.” Ron said when he arrived to the house.

    “Oh, Ron. You made it. Lovely.” Pepsi Girl said sarcastically.

    “Ron, you so awesome!” His manager Harvey Lemmings added.

    Ron’s eyes started tearing up. “You guys are my best friends!” He said as he went in for a hug, only to get pushed away by Pepsi Girl.

    “Oh, Milkton! My hero!” Mrs. Bieber said to ManBearPig.

    “Milkton?” A confused TaylorCondrin quietly asked tli232, who shrugged.

    “All that running made my rumpus even more sore.” SpencerisHawesome said.

    TaylorCondrin leaned over to tli232 and whispered, “He really doesn’t add anything to the plot, does he?”

    “I heard that!” SpencerisHawesome shouted as tli232 and TaylorCondrin giggled amongst themselves.

    “Maybe we should get out of the open,” Pepsi Girl mentioned. “You know, before the freaks find us.”

    “Yeah, or those dirty, nasty aliens.” tli added.

    “Aliens?” Pepsi Girl asked.

    “Oh, yeah. I forgot to mention. I’ve been pursued by an army of monster-rapist aliens. They’ve already gotten to TaylorCondrin and Ron Artest.”

    “Hey!” TaylorCondrin exclaimed. “Yo, keep that on the DL…”

    “Wrong again, fruit-filling! Me and OrangeJuiceJones’ encounter was totally consensual!” Ron said to the stunned-looking group. “He was dressed up as a white girl… I had no way of knowing…”

    “Well as long as they’re gay…” Pepsi Girl said. “Whatever, let’s get inside! We can hang out in the bomb shelter I keep in my backyard. They’re is enough supplies to keep five people alive for six weeks.”

    “But, there are eight of us…” Mrs. Bieber said.

    “Whoa, some of you guys really flew under the radar… Well, I’m in the bomb shelter, because I own it. Four of you can join me. The other three will have to find a way to kill the leader of SBR, Eli Porter. You can stay in my house for a while, but they are going to find you eventually. It was the house that Home Alone was filmed in, so you could set some traps up if you want to. Now, to decide who stays safe in the bomb shelter…”

    SpencerisHawesome, Ron Artest, tli232, TaylorCondrin, Mrs. Bieber, ManBearPig and Harvey Lemmings all looked at each other.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Randy Jackson found 38 empty boxes of ex-lax in the garbage. However, he was too dim-witted to put two and two together and he began to announce, “I have no choice to declare the winner, Ped-“. Randy was interrupted by a 2 by 4 being smashed into his head. As Randy hit the ground unconscious, TossedSaladMan threw aside his piece of wood.

    “Alright — you see what I’m sayin’ — I cheated. But it don’t matter, ya feel me? If you want this badge, you still gotta earn it, dig?” TossedSaladMan said.

    mikenike thought to himself for a minute, and then his face lit up with excitement. “I’ve got it!” he said with a snap of his finger. “I’ll be right back!”

    mikenike flew out the door, as John Bryant exited the bathroom with the sound of a toilet flushing behind him. “Bryant?” John asked as he watched mikenike fly away.

    “He’s coming back for ya…” TossedSaladMan said to John. “Hey John, you ever seen the inside of my clos-”

    mikenike reentered the room holding a bed in his left hand and a crate in his right. “I brought you a present, TossedSaladMan!” mikenike said as he set the bed down.

    The small boy inside the bed was just waking up. “Whaa…? What’s happening?” The boy asked as he rubbed his eyes.

    “This… This is a gift? A gift for me?” TossedSaladMan asked.

    “Yeah! I brought you the most pink-cheeked, robust boy I could find. His name is Therevenger. And just look at that mouth.”

    TossedSaladMan looked into the eyes of Therevenger. “Beautiful! You, my friend, are never going to see the outside of my closet again! I hope you like jelly. Ya feel me? Jelly”

    “Speaking of which…” mikenike said as he opened the crate.”I bought you 50 pounds of the purest, most sticky jelly you are ever going to find. I got it from France!”

    “Who are you people? Oh my gosh! Look out, there’s a bear!” Therevenger said, still wearing his Spiderman pajamas.

    Completely ignoring the boy, TossedSaladMan continued talking to mikenike. “You’re alright kid. Here’s the fifth badge, you know what I’m sayin’. Take it and enjoy.”

    “Thank you. You enjoy as well.” mikenike responded as he accepted the badge from TossedSaladMan.

    “Oh, you better believe I will. Gingers! Clear out the closet, and chain this boy up!” TossedSaladMan ordered his ginger-slaves.

    mikenike and John Bryant exited the palace in good spirits.

    “Now we got all five badges! It’s time to go to the top of the mountain!”

    “John Bryant!?!” John asked.

    “No, John.” mikenike said while chuckling. “We’re never going to see TossedSaladMan or PedoBear again.

    “John Bryant!”

    “Yeah John, I don’t think anyone is ever going to see Therevenger again!”

    mikenike and John Bryant broke into a hysteric laughter as they climbed up the mountain to finish their long journey.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Dad, I’m coming to help you!” Derrick Favors shouted to Quincey.

    “No, son. I want you to stay in your chair!” Quincey responded as he started turning around to face his opponent. “Alright benchy, show me wha–” Sergio slammed a chair into Quincey’s face. He fell to the ground apparently unconscious.

    Sergio walked to the side of the ring and looked at Derrick. “See, that? Your father ain’t nothing but a punk.”

    But Quincey was only playing possum. He leaped up and tackled Sergio. They both fell out of the ring. Quincey picked up a sweaty towel, and began trying to snap Sergio with it. Sergio ran out of arena, Quincey in hot pursuit. They ran for 4 blocks, every snap getting closer to Sergio’s arse. Sergio tipped over a garbage can to gain an advantage on his aggressor. Quincey tripped over the garbage can, but picked himself up quickly, balled up the towel and threw it at Sergio. Sergio evaded the towel by making a sharp turn right, and entering a pawn shop. Quincey followed him, and picked up a baseball bat that was for sale. He smacked Sergio in his kneecap with the bat, causing the Spaniard to fall to the ground in agony. Quincey held the bat high in the air, ready to kill his rival. “I’m going to bring the Spain…” Before he could finish the job that his cheesy-action movie line started, he heard the pump-action of a shotgun.

    Both Quincey and Sergio looked over to the owner of the pawn shop, pointing a shotgun in their direction. “Drop the bat.” He directed to Quincey, who proceeded to drop the bat right on Sergio’s head.

    “Ow, he did that on purpose!” Sergio whined.

    “Shut up Mexican.” The owner replied.

    “But I’m…”

    “I said shut up!”

    The pawn shop owner walked over to Quincey and struck him with the butt of the shotgun. Then did the same to Sergio, knocking them both out cold.

    Sergio and Quincey woke up being hosed down with gasoline. They were tied up and gagged. There was the pawn shop owner and a police officer looking at them and playing eenie-meenie-miney-moe. They landed on Sergio, who was pulled into the back room. The pawn shop owner unlocked a box and let out a big gimp. “You watch him.” The owner directed to the gimp, as he entered the back room with the police officer and Sergio.

    Quincey and the gimp stared at each other, overhearing the brutal sounds of a man-rape coming from the back room. Quincey used all his strength to try to break out of the bonds that tied his hands together. He felt them becoming a bit looser. Then he burst threw the ropes. The gimp tried to alert the owner, but Quincey punched him, causing him to fall and hit his head on a toolbox in the corner. He fell to the floor. “What’s the matter, gimp? You feeling a little limp?” Quincey said. Quincey was on his way out of the pawn shop, but then he began to empathize with Sergio Rodriguez. He could still hear the sounds of cowboy noises and spanking. He contemplated whether he should save Sergio or not…

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Oh, look what you did! My van!” talldreamy_doc said.

    “GIVE THE CARD NOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!” The lady shouted obnoxiously.

    And the scene faded out…

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  • #329560
    AvatarAvatar
    Mr.Knick 32
    Participant

    …. Until Knicksboy shows up!

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  • #329567
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    apb540
    Participant

    This is a good draft thread. Glad i clicked on this

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  • #329571
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    butidonthavemoney

    What were you expecting to see when you clicked on Popcorn Story Dos?

    Seriously, I would like to know.

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  • #329573
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    Michael.S.
    Participant

    Probably about Demarcus Cousins diet program????? Butidonthavemoney…I am getting into it this time…I will continue the story

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  • #329574
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    butidonthavemoney

    Excellent…

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  • #329587
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    McDunkin

    i approve

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  • #329599
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    McDunkin

    ok now im pissed i wasnt mentioned in it

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  • #329601
    AvatarAvatar
    butidonthavemoney

    Start a segment about yourself.

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  • #329604
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    SpencerIsHawesome2
    Participant

    Spencerishawesome slapped everyone in the face that was looking at eachother then proceeded to piss on each one of them, except TLI because he knew he would like it.

    He then decided to run away from the group and begin his own adventure to get Brian Zoubek drafted. Along the way to meet Zoubek he ran into McDunkin………

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  • #329612
    AvatarAvatar
    McDunkin

    As i was leaving my .gif addicts anonymous meeting i saw Spencerishawesome riding by on his silver,purple,and black rascal scooter. He explained the mission to get Zoubek drafted to me,and i said “i know who could help!”…The one and only quinceyhodges.

    I told him to he was probably at the grocery store buying Capri Sun juice boxes for the Stanford mens basketball teams “History & Hoops” camping trip where they do homework, go over plays, and reminisce on how cool winning was when the lopez twins were still there..I then yelled “Lets Do This!” as i popped the wheels out of my Heely Skate Shoes.

    Thats when we ran into….

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  • #329617
    AvatarAvatar
    butidonthavemoney

    A wizard. "Hey kids! Take a walk on the wild side!" The wizard said.

    "Umm… No thanks." McDunkin said.

    "Oh come on, I’ve got some candy…"

    "Candy! I love candy!" SpencerisHawesome cried.

    "I dunno SpencerisHawesome… I don’t trust this guy…" McDunkin said.

    "Why not? Just look at him. From his trustworthy glasses, to his I’m not a pedophile beard, and look, he has crayons in his pocket! What could possibly go wrong?"

    McDunkin had to make a decision. To stick with his friend and go with the wizard, or trust his instincts and get the eff out of there.

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  • #329627
    AvatarAvatar
    McDunkin

    Being the friend that i am i decided to take of on my shoe skates but when one of the wheels broke off i decided to stick with SpencerisHawesome and help him hold onto his backside virginity.

    The wizard had us take a magical shortcut that looked almost exactly like a dirt road behind an abandoned 7-11. After 30 minutes of walking we got to a wooden fort that i noticed had an old, faded sign that read “No Girls Allowed!” i remembered seeing this sign somewhere before.

    As i tried to remember where i had seen that sign the wizard told us to follow him inside where there was a table covered in candybars and Adidas Eurocamp scouting reports he told us to wait while he maid us a “Happy Time Drink” known as the “TLI Special”

    My cellphone began to play “Milkshake” by Kelis so i knew i had to be getting a call from TheRevenger

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  • #329631
    AvatarAvatar
    butidonthavemoney

    Therevenger said "All glory to the Hypnotoad…"

    McDunkin repeated "All glory to the Hypnotoad…"

    McDunkin hung up the phone, 100% satisfied with the conversation he just had.

    "Come on in boys… The fun awaits…" The Wizard said.

    As McDunkin and SpencerisHawesome looked around the gloomy looking fort, they were greeted by a strange talking-armadillo…

    "Hiya fellas! My name is Aran_Smith, and I need a favor from you."

    "What do you want with us?" McDunkin asked.

    "I have a renegade agent who has been linked to a Columbia drug cartel. I need you two to find him, and kill him."

    "What’s his name?"

    "…tli232….."

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  • #329641
    AvatarAvatar
    SpencerIsHawesome2
    Participant

    As quick as the man who called himself aran_smith spit out the 2 in tli232’s name Spencerishawesome screamed the girliest shriek in the history of man-kind.

    As he was shrieking he realized aran_smith and his friend mcdunkin were staring at him, so he stopped the shriek and proceeded to act as if it was not him “Wow that was loud.. I wonder where that came from” Spencer said nervously “ha.ha..”

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