My good friend McDesperate confessed to me recently via Playstation Network messege that he just got out of a long-term relationship (his girlfriend ran away with some guy that bullies him) and he’s looking for something new and exciting. I’ve decided that since we’re both Draft.net veterens, that I would start by looking for someone here. If you’re single and looking for something special, take a look at this form McGoober filled out.
Full Name: McDunkin
Sex: Male
Ethnicity: 97% Canadian, 3% Native Alaskan
Age: 23
Occupation: Point Escort
Interested In: Preferably Women (Will make an exception for James Franco)
Bio: Hi, I’m McDunkin. How are you? I’m sad, but I bet if we were together I would be real happy. I bet you want to know a little more about me. I like trains. I play with my train set all the time, but don’t worry, I’d let you play with them too! Just as long as you wash your hands first! Sometimes I like to pretend I’m riding the trains and you’re with me and we’re riding to the park to get married. My last girlfriend broke my heart and ate one of my trains. Her new lover is a bad man. I wouldn’t let him play with my trains. Not even if he paid me, because I have integrity.
Every morning I eat a well-balanced breakfast of six eggrolls and two cans of chili. Consequencely, doctors have described my stomach as having the proporties of a lava-lamp. They’ve also described the noises my stomach emits as resembling a novice bagpipe multiplayer practice session. If you like music and exotic culture, you’ll love my stomach, and my trains. I made a theme song that I sing sometimes when I’m playing with my trains. It’s called "C’Mon N Ride It (The Train)" and I wrote most of it myself. Some was borrowed by a song of the same name made in the 90s, but I made lots of changes. As you can tell, I’m very musical.
But everything isn’t all fun and trains, I work very hard at my job. I troll Internet boards for gifs and silly pictures and distribute them for points on my favorite site. I’m so popular, I’m actually the top point leader on the site. Nobody respects me yet, but I’m trying to save enough points to buy a real train. Then I bet they’ll all want to be my friend so they can ride my train. I’d let them ride, and everybody would like me.
Hobbies: One of my favorite hobbies is dancing. Sometimes I dance to Hall and Oates in front of my stuffed animals. They think I’m real good. Sometimes they cheer so loud, and then they want to play with my trains. I, of course, let them. I’m very unselfish.
I also like posting Family Guy quotes all day on my Twitter account. I bet all of my followers laugh so hard when they read them. Too bad I only have two followers and they’re both spambots. Maybe you could follow me. I’d follow back of course.
Another hobby I have is trains. To be honest, I don’t see the point of car ownership. Not when trains exist in the world. I sure like trains, but don’t worry, trains can’t replace you. That’s because I love you so much, maybe even more than trains. Can’t wait to meet you. Attached is a photo of me.
I think McDunkin is cool without his train. Coolest guy outta the 10 of my friends on PSN. If James Franco knew about McDunkin this wouldn’t even be a forum topic.
I think McDunkin is cool without his train. Coolest guy outta the 10 of my friends on PSN. If James Franco knew about McDunkin this wouldn’t even be a forum topic.
0
0
0
0
0
